You know, when I’m doing creative things like directing and writing, it doesn’t seem all that bad. In fact, I make myself feel more bad than it is because my guilt doesn’t think I should be having such a good time while working.
It’s OK, I took guilt out back of the woodshed and pounded some sense into it. If it tries that sh*t again, I got the Frisbee all primed with duct tape…
There are two main types of fear for the performing artist.
Sensible. Like, “My agent landed me an audition for the spider musical. Should I go out for it?”
Senseless. Like, “Adults don’t behave like this, people won’t like me if I continue.”
I fight every day with the senseless kind. And sometimes there’s the challenge of categorizing which slot a fear belongs in.
Thankfully, the neuroses which feed the senseless fears are getting weaker. I’m going to say it’s because of increased confidence and not because of old age.
Two separate spam filters have eaten my Fringe lottery ticket e-mail and a Google Groups submission from the screenwriting group I’m involved in.
It’s annoying, especially when I’ve gotten e-mails through from the same e-mail addresses previously with no action on my part.
Frickin’ technology, a double-edged sword.
Life is what happens when you’re making other plans, as the pundits say. And so it’s happened here. My performing and producing activities are going down to near zero (barring a miracle), but my writing time is going to shoot right up.
Develop a thick skin and never give up. The two keys to success in show biz. Talent helps a bit. Read more…
However, maybe if I cut back on the self-doubt time and Internet time, it might give me some more slack to use in more useful endeavors. Like acting and monologues and such. What a concept!
This world is going nutso. And I think only good art can slow it down enough to look at itself to see how nutso it is.